What If We Held a Debate and Nobody Came?

When it comes to radio personalities, Michael Savage is usually not my cup of tea.  But I nearly stood up and cheered when I recently heard him on Laura Ingraham's show.

Ms. Ingraham had earlier in the program exhaustively analyzed the previous evening's Republican presidential debate.  She played and dissected numerous clips of the dustups among Perry, Romney, and the others.  But when she queried Mr. Savage on his opinion of the debate, she was met with a couple seconds of silence.  Then Savage told her he hadn't watched, and frankly, he didn't care.  After all, the election was fourteen months away.

Commence cheering!

I felt like a participant in a therapy session who finally discovered that I'm not alone, that there are other people who feel the same way I do.  Although not a fan of conspiracy theories, I can't shake the suspicion that these useless debates are a scheme cooked up by the Ruling Class to get the country to ignore the goings-on by the establishment in Washington.  While we're all staring at eight or nine Republicans like infants entranced by a twirling mobile, Obama and the Democrats carry on destroying the country with nary a concern that the Tea Party might notice and get riled up.

And don't forget the media.  They too have a vested interest in focusing on the presidential campaign so ridiculously early.  As I have written previously, today's journalist is a leftist ideologue who is unbelievably lazy.  If the media didn't have these debates every week to promote and then rehash 24 hours a day, they might have to actually cover real news stories like Solyndra, Fast and Furious, the tanking stock market, skyrocketing unemployment, Europe imploding, Iraq/Afghanistan/Libya, debt, deficits, taxes, ObamaCare...

Reporting on the above list requires actual effort on the part of our intrepid news folks.  Since the mainstream media has the work ethic of Maynard G. Krebs, it's no wonder they would much rather be spoon-fed their stories by the various campaigns after a Republican debate.

The Republican establishment in Washington also loves the eternal campaign.  I actually heard one supposed conservative commentator during the debt ceiling debate in August state that the Tea Party should just shut up and accept the deal with the White House because we're in an election year, and nothing can be accomplished until we have a new president.

I was torn between screaming and wanting to organize an effort to mail every one of these people a calendar.  When an elitist, pompous blowhard living in the D.C. bubble tells the Tea Party they have to wait until 2013 for solutions to the Obama catastrophe, I'm reminded of a nurse I once had the misfortune to work with.  This angel of mercy would breeze into change-of-shift report and inform us, "The post-op in 301 asked for a pain shot a while ago. Since it was so close to shift change, I told him he had to wait for you."

So the poor guy in 301 is lying in excruciating pain, waiting for me to come on duty and give him some relief because Florence Nightingale wanted to finish her charting.  It's a perfect analogy to what the establishment Republicans are telling us:

"We understand you're in pain, with nine percent unemployment, rising gas and food prices, enough federal regulations to choke a whale, and a federal debt the size of Montana.  But it's really close to regime change time.  So you'll just have to wait.  In the meantime, we've prepared some entertaining presidential debates for you to watch.  Oh, and one more thing -- those of us here in Washington would appreciate it if you'd lay off your call bell!"

In watching this circus, I've come to the conclusion that the only winner has been Sarah Palin.  Governor Palin has steadfastly refused to declare her candidacy to participate in these early debates, despite the screeching from the Republican intelligentsia and the media.  She seems to see what the rest of us see: that this far out from the primaries, debates serve no positive purpose.  It's embarrassing to watch accomplished, intelligent candidates submit themselves to questioning from a hostile news media so moronic that a couple of years ago they actually believed that Barack Obama was a "sort of God."

Come on, candidates! Take a page from Sarah Palin's playbook and stop playing by the establishment's rules.  The best thing you can do this election season is also the most difficult.  You need to trust the conservative electorate.  Trust us to listen to you, to study the issues, and to pick a candidate on our own, without reliance on this contrived sound bite cattle call.

With no leaders, and complete disdain for the Republican establishment, the Tea Party made history in 2010.  So why in the world would today's candidates believe that we are now going to return to the tired, old, unsuccessful methods of choosing a president?  Last week all the smart people told us that Rick Perry is floundering and Mitt Romney is inevitable.  So what did the conservatives in Florida do in the straw poll this past weekend?  They completely ignored the debate analysis of the Republican intelligentsia and gave Herman Cain an overwhelming victory.

You need to trust us.  Everything is different this election, and people out here are in pain.  Quit debating and start doing everything in your power to stop Obama and the Democrats now.  After all, it's a really long time till the next shift arrives. 

Carol Peracchio is a registered nurse.

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