PrintOctober 3, 2009
The Green Aston Martin
The prince arrived in his Aston Martin
And told his mum the Queen
"I fear we'll be in a coffin
If we don't all go green"
"We are in an awful snare.
All the telltale clues
Have been reported everywhere.
It's been in all the news"
"Where there used to be there is no ice
The earth is getting dry.
What Al Gore has said thrice
Cannot be a lie"
The Queen furrowed her brow
As she sucked upon a mint.
"I say, is it too late now
To reduce our carbon footprint"
The prince looked worried, then he said
"I'll begin a serious gambit
To save our subjects from the dead
I shall save the planet"
Across his meadows he gazed
And wondered where to start
There before him cattle grazed
"I'll begin with the simple cow fart"
Never one to be delayed
He called his men and one farm lass
And ordered study to be made
On cows farting methane gas
Next he called his Butlers, Chefs, and Hatters
And ordered them to thinking
About green footprint matters
Then he went to drinking
Resting now, sipping wine
Weary from his labor
He plucked a grape from the vine
Hanging from the arbor
Then a plan began to form
He nurtured it with care
Thinking outside the norm
Too unorthodox to share
Workers sworn to secrecy
Began work upon his plan
Hidden now, no one could see
The Aston Martin drops its pan.
They tweaked and twiddled through the night
And even days on end
Until they had things just right
Success was just around the bend.
The Royal cheese men brought the whey
The vine men brought the plonk
It was blessed and stirred throughout a day
By one devoted Buddhist monk.
The Martin sat beside fermented brew
The smell was foul and rank
The Royal mechanic sneezed "Ah Choo"!
Then poured it in the tank
Breath is held and key is turned
A great moment to enthrall
The foul brew being burned
Is a special blend of ethanol
The Martin runs down the roads
The Prince with face a shine
Rolling past peasant abodes
Powered by cheese and wine
Now you may think it silly, maybe even sleazy
But some elite writers raved
Al Gore may now rest easy
For the planet has been saved!
UK Daily Mail:
