Passover plagues from our Pharaoh

By Harold Witkov

Because the Pharaoh of Egypt was a stubborn man 3,500 years ago, his subjects were afflicted with ten plagues. These plagues will be remembered tonight as part of a ritual dinner called a seder in Jewish homes around the world.

During the seder, the seder leader will, one at a time, name each plague out loud. The gathered family members will then repeat the name of each plague and, with the tip of a finger or fork, remove a corresponding drop of wine from their glasses and place each drop upon their saucers. In this way, Jews acknowledge with regret the sufferings of their Egyptian enemies.

These are the ten plagues inflicted upon the Egyptians:

Blood

Frogs

Vermin

Flies

Murrain

Boils

Hail

Locusts

Darkness

Slaying of the first born

Because of the stubbornness of the man who thinks of himself as our Pharaoh, we are now afflicted with ten plagues of our own. Say each one aloud and shed a corresponding tear for our own nation and people:

Chicago-style politics running Washington

Double-digit unemployment

Unprecedented debt

Government takeovers of the private sector

16,500 new IRS agents

Downsized economy

Czars

Higher Taxes

Wealth redistribution

Continued slaying of the unborn

... And may the next presidential election bring a conservative president to the White House. Amen.