There's something about Kamala

The Democrat party elders asked the oracle, how do you get rid of an unwanted vice president?  Three ways, the oracle replied.  Impeach and convict her, ask her to resign for the good of the party and nation, or...bribe her by offering an appointment to the Supreme Court. 

Conviction would require at least seventeen consenting Republican senators.  The elders know that's unlikely, for why would the GOP help the Dems out of their sinking ship dilemma?  A principled resignation by this super self-serving woman?  The elders half–kill themselves laughing.  The Supreme Court option, hmmm.


Kamala Harris (edited in befunky).  YouTube Screen grab.

Okay, let's dangle a lifetime sinecure on the hallowed Supreme Court in front of Kamala.  That might do the trick.  (This is not the first time Kamala has been considered for the Court — check out the back in the day photo.) 

Would the V.P. agree to quit her office?  Right now, no matter how much Kamala is vilified and disrespected, she still becomes POTUS if anything happens to Joe.  Over three years remain in his term, and the oracle says it's fifty-fifty whether double-stroke Joe goes the distance.  Would Kamala take the sure thing sinecure or gamble on gaining the most powerful office in the land? 

The oracle predicts that Kamala will accept nomination to the Supreme Court.  What, then, are the prospects for confirmation?  Even the Dems might recoil at the prospect of such a congenital bumbler sitting on the Court. 

The elders know that Kamala needs to go.  If a Court seat is the price, so be it.  Besides, she has always reliably voted left-wing.  Her replacing Breyer won't change the outcome of cases.  Plus she will mostly be out of sight, out of mind.

If the Democrats stick together, including wayward Manchin and Sinema, then the Senate Republicans can't stop confirmation.  Senate rules do not permit the filibuster concerning Judicial or Executive Branch nominations. 

A current member of the Court must retire to make way for Kamala.  Justice Stephen Breyer (83 years old) is the most obvious candidate.

Would Breyer step aside?  He is certainly aware of Kamala's disastrous poll numbers and complete unsuitability for the presidency.  Unlike Kamala, he probably would resign for the good of the party and nation.  A reward of a cushy ambassadorship (Bermuda?) could help along his decision.

So.  Justice Breyer resigns.  Joe nominates Kamala to replace Breyer.  After cursory hearings, the Senate holds a confirmation vote.  Kamala is still V.P., which is necessary to break a likely 50-50 tie.  Kamala is confirmed. 

In a giant loophole, the Constitution does not prohibit a person from simultaneously holding offices in the Executive and Judicial Branches.  This, for Democrat plans, is absolutely necessary.  The Republicans howl, but the caravan passes on.

On the Senate floor, Kamala immediately announces her intention to resign from the vice presidency.  The resignation will become effective at the same moment the Senate confirms the nomination of her replacement (most likely a Black female).

Joe puts his nomination for vice president before Congress.  The House Democrats, with wafer-thin but still absolute control of the chamber, quickly agree to his choice.  All that remains is for the Senate to confirm.

From the top tier of the dais, Kamala Harris presides as president of the Senate.  The next vice president sits beaming in the gallery directly above the dais.  (The oracle bets she is Muriel Bowser, mayor of D.C.).  This is truly a historic moment.

On the news channels, the nation watches, as does President Brandon in the Oval Office.  Joe readies to sign Kamala's tendered resignation.  Hovering beside him is Dr. Jill, the celebrated neurosurgeon.  How she has longed for this day, to be rid of Heels Up Harris for good.

Alas, alas.  Jill's day is ruined before the vote even starts. 

With her trademark cackle, Kamala produces a certified copy of her resignation letter.  À la Nancy Pelosi, Kamala tears it up.  Doing Nancy one better, she flings the paper shards into the air.  She then announces to the stunned chamber she is not resigning. 

Kamala the Inept, the Ridiculed, the Despised has outfoxed them all.

As a postscript, let us consider a possible ensuing scenario.  Shock and rage send Joe into his third, this time fatal, stroke.  Kamala becomes president.  Kamala pulls a Bill Clinton and triangulates.  She seals the border and delays the Green New Deal.  Inflation subsides, and the economy takes off.  Her approval ratings soar.  In the 2022 elections, the Democrats hang on to their slim majorities.  Kamala becomes the favorite to win her party's 2024 presidential nomination and probably the general election.  As Dean Martin sang, ain't that a kick in the head?

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