At first glance, it seems bizarre, even satirical, to suggest that milk products have negative behavioral consequences.  But a substantial body of literature makes that case.

Bureaucrats are quick to blame the surge in violent crime on illegal drugs (fentanyl, cocaine, heroin), Putin's inflation, food insecurity, lack of education, discrimination, crushing student debt, and the need for comprehensive "living-wage" legislation, but there may be other possible explanations.

A 1979 scientific, peer-reviewed study provides compelling evidence of a "link" between milk consumption and aberrant behavior among chronic juvenile offenders.  In today's world, this manifests itself as an escalation of murders and lawlessness, which could be attributed to bad parenting and dairy products.

This important document can be found on several medical and Department of Justice websites:

The abstract of "Critical Analysis of the Diets of Chronic Juvenile Offenders" can be read in just two minutes, and the study itself offers several prescient predictions.

[T]he excessive milk consumption results in general protein excess, with possible biochemical reactions which might ultimately affect behavior[.] (Journal of Orthomolecular Psychiatry [abstract #NCJ-065028])

Since the early 1980's, many medical, dietary, and psychological studies have correlated criminal behavior, depression, obesity, gang affiliations, intestinal disorders, and dysfunctional families with specific disaccharides of sugar and galactose (found only in milk and dairy products), including cheese, butter, and ice cream.  These chemicals are frequently found in thousands of baked goods such as donuts, cakes, puddings, and Twinkies.

If an individual already is suffering from a wheat, shellfish, egg, soy, or peanut allergy, adding lactose as a secondary ingredient can produce serious (sometimes lethal) metabolic or allergic reactions...including violent behavior.

Is it such a stretch to acknowledge that milk (one of the top ten food allergens), in addition to being famous for exacerbating constipation, gastroenteritis, insomnia, IBS, severe asthmatic attacks, diabetes, heart disease, palpitations, GERD, esophageal erosion, acne, eczema, brittle bones and "an increased risk of breast, ovarian and prostate cancers," might also be linked to criminal behavior in juveniles and those who identify, for sentencing purposes, as a post-juvenile?

Most young gangbangers, whether male or female, are likely suffering from raging hormones, insomnia, depression, or blocked bowels because of too much toxic dairy consumption.  Under such conditions, even some adults are prone to a commit violent crimes.

I hope Thinker readers will take some time to review and analyze the hundreds of online surveys and thousands of articles regarding the hazardous dietary habits of youthful offenders, in particular the article "Got Milk? Got Depression!" (June 22, 2013 WeeksMD[dot]com).

Most of the 525 "depression + milk = crime" articles online have been verified.

If you do a Google or DuckDuckGo search for "do dairy products contribute to depression and crime" (use the quotation marks), here is a spattering of more than 7 million results.  Note that the first "hit" is from the National Center for Biotechnical Information (NIH Library).

So-called homemade and "secret" breakfast recipes are unwittingly "feeding" violence events from childhood.  Almost all of "Granny's" ingredients contain a deadly white substance, found in both powder and liquid forms.

This single ingredient, a cheap, easily available, crime-inducing chemical found in juvenile diets, isn't purchased on the street corner, on the black market, or in a dark alley.  It's found in family refrigerators; boutique restaurants; Big Box stores; and, shockingly, even over the internet.

Let's call milk what it really is: a commodity of "instant rage and depression."

Buttermilk and cottage cheese are still legal to consume in all states and throughout most of the Middle East, and although milk is not (yet) classified as a Schedule 1 Drug, like fentanyl, heroin, or cocaine, it can be habit-forming, mood-changing, and deadly.  It must be subject to regulation.

The FDA and CDC have known for decades that heart disease, cancer, and stroke are the three biggest killers in America, yet regulators have failed to require tobacco-like warning labels on food items, bundt cakes, canned goods, and cartons containing milk or milk derivatives.

Forget face masks and social distancing mandates; we're talking about cross-linked neurons, pre-penitentiary fury, constipation, high cholesterol, and ice cream diets, which eventually lead to murderous delinquency.

Tragic crime stories reveal the spontaneous bursts of violence committed by lactose-intolerant young felons, pancake house security guards, and disgruntled restaurant employees.

Most of the video reports are not suitable for young viewers but include first-person reports and photos of shootings, which were most likely caused by biscuits, waffles, cheese-burgers, and shakes laden with milk.

From N.Y. Daily News — a compilation of numerous stories:

January 25, 2019, Myrtle Beach, FL (triggered by a dirty knife and pancakes)

March 17, 2021, San Jose, CA

August 31, 2020, Chicago, IL

September 26, 2008, New Orleans, LA

August 15, 2012 with Nov 2, 2016 updates

June 17, 2004, Fayetteville, NC

March 22, 2022, Panama City Beach, AL

July 29, 2013, Fulton County, GA (Atlanta) robber is eventually shot

November 3, 2013, Lexington, KY

August 30, 2020, Chicago, IL 

November 30, 2015, Biloxi, MS (fatal argument over smoking policy)

August 1, 2016, Charleston, SC

July 19, 2020, Charleston, SC

Nov 21, 2017, a comedian rant about Waffle House goes viral — inspires violence!

Jan 9, 2018, Columbia, MO

Mar 7, 2018, Norfolk, VA

April 26, 2018, Valley, AL

Scientific studies have proven that unregulated dairy products are responsible for serious global health problems, mental disorders, irrational thoughts, early puberty, short attention span, dyslexia, ADHD, kidney stones, IBS, PMS, E.D., PTSD, the vapors, hoplophobia, political violence, road rage, and (most importantly) the temporary milk-soaked insanity created by eating Twinkies.

Something must be done immediately to save innocent children from being poisoned by greasy-spoon desserts, "kids meals," chocolate chip pancakes, and crepes, which probably came from China.

Pudding and cheese-whizzed sandwiches are still being served at nursery schools, prisons, jails, universities, elementary schools, and most institutional cafeterias...including in hospitals!

Bad behavior becomes worse when incarcerated juveniles (and pre-adults) are forced to endure a constant ingestion of snack toxins and washed down with gallons of milk.  This judicial carousel guarantees only two things: long-term health problems and increased recidivism rates.

Eliminating milk from all prisons, elementary schools, and college campuses will improve chances of graduation through sustained mental acuity and improved self-esteem, decrease the chances of Alzheimer's, and increase the possibility of employment.  

In addition to greedy dairy producers and exploited cows, the biggest culprits driving our milk-consumption crime spree are the uneducated, unenlightened, un-woke parents who still insist on serving their children cold sugar-cereals floating in dangerous white chemicals.

Next question: Are parents who feed their children dairy products guilty of child abuse?  Perhaps a mandatory, federally funded "Parental Licensing" program is in order?

It's time for commonsense milk control, beginning with the registration of all dairy owners and setting free all conscripted Guernsey and Holstein bovines.

No cattle were disrespected or injured during the formulation of this rant.

If these suggestions save just one life, it's worth it.

Dale Lowdermilk is the founder of NOTSAFE(.)ORG and an eighth-generation descendant of the Lautermilch tribe of infamous German dairy farmers.

Photo credit: Piqsels, public domain.