WaPo tries humor: Black family terrorized by white doll

The news has been a bit of a downer recently, what with the ongoing war in Ukraine, a new flare-up of conflict in Kosovo, and a possible nuclear showdown between the U.S. and China.  However, about a week ago, I came across this article, and now I would like to share it with all of you.  The article is called "Someone gave our daughter a White doll. How do we, um, 'disappear' it?"

The writer of said article seems to be a regular contributor to the Washington Post, and if I am honest, this seems to be his best work.  Honestly, my first reaction to seeing the headline was, "Seriously?  The Washington Post, a supposedly reputable publication, is publishing this?"

Dear aspiring writers: If they are willing to take this, then I would have no fear of anyone else's work being rejected.  Then again, perhaps this is his attempt at humor.

Returning to it, if you are hesitant to read the article on the Post's own site, then this kindly communist Redditor uploaded the entire text.  (Part 1 and Part 2.)  Important context: The writer is black, and I am pretty sure his wife and daughter are as well.

So, to offer some of the best quotes:

We still don't know how it got into our house. Maybe it was a present from my mother-in-law. (She regularly sneaks toys and snacks to our kids like they're prisoners and Cheetos gets them phone card minutes.)

Keep this in mind; it might become important later.  The man goes on to describe that his six-year-old daughter all of a sudden started playing with this white doll that is made to resemble a baby with blonde hair.  He continues by saying that he and his wife believe that their daughter should be able to love herself and her appearance.

Honestly, there is nothing wrong with that.  Their daughter should be able to see herself as beautiful no matter her skin color.  He then addresses how, in a predominantly white country, he worries that his daughter might be overly exposed to white beauty standards; thus, he and his wife buy her only toys of "people of color."  The justification is that a child will find a doll precious and find its features precious; therefore, it is right for her to be exposed only to dolls that do not look like white people.

Given the idea that giving a girl a baby doll is supposed to create within her a motherly, nurturing nature, I suppose he is trying to foster an environment wherein she finds non-white people worth nurturing.  Query: If your daughter adopts or (assuming Eric Swalwell's fever dreams do not come true) has her own children who are white, is she not supposed to find them precious?

So, on the basis of her skin color, the white doll cannot stay in their house.  To continue:

Anyway, when my wife and I were brainstorming how to dispose of Daisy — which is what we named the doll — the first thing I thought of was to wait until our daughter went to sleep, sneak into her bedroom, and then, um, "disappear" Daisy, like I was SEAL Team Four.

I see.  So, in a household where they purchase only non-white dolls, he thought it was wise to disappear the one exceptional doll?  The WaPo must be proud.

He then states that he dismissed this idea and instead liked the idea of making a "flash mob" of 500 black dolls so that "[i]f Daisy happened to retreat from the Black doll mosh pit, Daisy should ask herself why Black dolls make her uncomfortable."

Just what is he trying to teach his daughter anyway?

Last particularly rich bit:

I also thought that passive-aggressive warfare might be the solution. Let's say our daughter brought Daisy to dinner.

Me: I'm sorry.

Daughter: What's wrong, Daddy?

Me: We're having pizza, and Daisy's gluten-free.

Daughter: What does that mean?

Me: That means Daisy needs to sit in the garage.

So I guess we have abandoned discriminating against Daisy for being white and are now discriminating against her for her disability?  Seems like a pretty rotten lesson.

The little girl eventually just moved on to a new favorite toy, like a normal kid.

You know, when I was a kid, I watched The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air and never once thought anything of the fact that the cast was black.  They were just people.  Sadly, progressive identity politics has made it where nobody is allowed to have fun unless it fits in with what the moral overlords think.  (He prefers that she have these dolls instead.)  Please read the whole thing; it is quite an interesting look into this sort of mindset.

Breason Jacak is a pen name.

Image via Pxhere.

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